No Bystanders

I was recently forwarded an email of a eulogy a high school principal gave for a student that had passed away from his school.  The point of it all was that we should all avoid, at all costs, being a "bystander."  Bystanders are not involved in anything, never offer a true portion of themselves, and let things occur around them that they really don't agree with.  When we consistently find ourselves in a "bystander" role, the damage done to our self-image, psyche, and our soul is often irreparable.  There is no better feeling than stepping out of a bystander role and getting involved, giving of our talents and stepping up for those that cannot do it for themselves.  When we do that, we feel better about who we are and we are more productive.  Getting involved is one of the greatest forms of giving we can offer.  In this season of giving, consider giving your time, talents and treasure rather than relying on others to do it all.  What a great gift for yourself!



Game 6: A Lesson in Resilience

The St. Louis Cardinals World Series Championship was a lesson in resilience for all of us.  Admittedly, I am not the staunchest of baseball fans, but this team really got to me.  Down to their last out and strike, on the brink of elimination not once, but twice, the Cardinals refused to give in to defeat.  I watched game 6 and threw in the towel to the very tough and talented Texas Rangers more than once.  Yet, thankfully, the Cardinals never gave in.  I wonder how many times we concede defeat in our lives when the battle is not really done?  Do we always fight the good and worthy fight to the end?  Or,  do we concede defeat even before we have exhausted all our mental and physical capabilities?  Are we picking the "worthy" battle to fight or are we wasting our energies on a fight not worth fighting?  The Cardinals found a worthwhile battle and taught us a lesson in resiliency. 

The St. Louis Cardinals remind us all that when we enter into a worthy battle, we always win when we exhaust all our mental and physical resources to the very end. 

"Change Takes Persistence, Not Brilliance"

A school principal I met in Tennessee this summer made this statement to me.  She said, "Making change takes persistence, not brilliance." This simple, but profound quote sheds its truth in all areas of our lives.  If I want to get in shape, the consistency of the workout matters most in the long run.  If I am looking to learn a new skill, the persistence with which I practice and study the skill will lead to mastery. 

Sometimes we avoid undertaking what seems to be a daunting task because we feel we lack the intellectual capacity to complete it.  Sometimes we have to venture into the land of incompetence.  Of course, intelligence does play a major role, but so does the relentlessness with which we pursue the undertaking.  In the end, I think the persistence wins out.

Never Goes Out of Style-True Humility

John Wooden said, "Courtesy, politeness, and kindness" never go out of style.  I could not agree more.  I'd like to also add one thing that I have noticed that never goes out of style--true humility.  I am not speaking about a false humility in which someone downgrades their skills with the goal of really letting others within earshot know they actually do have these skills.  (This "false humility" is a mask for arrogance).  I am referring to the idea of letting others point out our positive points within us and not doing so ourselves.  It's OK to be good at something and acknowledge that, but the problem comes when we use that to downgrade others and make ourselves feel superior.  John Wooden also said, "Remember you are no better than anyone else, but just as good as everyone else."  Recalling this refrain is key to putting in perspective our sense of self worth.  John Wooden, the greatest coach ever, taught this skill to all his players.  Even Bill Walton, his most challenging personality, credits his coach with modeling a skill that never goes out of style--true humility

Rising Up

The 10th anniversary of 9-11 really hit me hard.  It seemed as if all the feelings and emotions that surfaced on that day 10 years ago were resurrected within.  I felt fear, anger, devastation, frustration and helplessness as I watched the numerous replays of the events that fateful day.

However, as I was watching a program on Discovery about the rebuilding of Ground Zero my thoughts and emotions took a turn for the better.  I saw the construction footage of the new tower--the building that when finished will be the tallest in our nation.  As they interviewed the men and women working on this mammoth project I also felt a renewed spirit.  Many of these workers had fathers or relatives that worked on the original World Trade Center.  Their determination, resilience, and laser-like focus on completing this mission was inspiring.

It was a wake up call to me as well.  They had a profound respect for the people that passed on 9-11-01, but a firm belief that the future ahead was bright and promising.  No, correct that.  They were imposing  their will on the future, if that is possible, by saying, "It will be bright, because we won't accept anything less."

The new One World Trade Center Tower rises up out of the ashes and makes a strong yet humble statement that no matter what tragedies and crimes befall us, we will always rise up after them.

LET'S ROLL!

Putting Your Whole Self In

It was 102 degrees in St. Louis on September 1st and my kids wanted to hit the pool.  We put on our swimsuits, got our towels, and walked over to the pool knowing this may be one of our last visits there this summer.  Upon entering, my children immediately threw themselves into the water with reckless abandon.  Meanwhile, I sat on a chair and watched from the pool deck.  I just wasn't sold on getting wet.  While I sat there sweating in this oppressive heat, my son shouted out, "Dad, what are you doing?  Did you just come here to sit on the side?  Get in here!"  His simple but wise plea awakened me.  I immediately hopped in the water and I must admit it felt pretty good.  But, that was not enough for my eldest son.  "Dad, you didn't even get your hair wet.  If you're gonna swim, you got to put your whole self in the water.  That's how you cool off!"  Again, I took his advice and submerged my "whole self" (including my head) underwater.

I wonder how often we miss out on something "better" because we are hesitant to put our "whole self in."  What a sad way to live--to only give a portion of what we have to our endeavors.  I am convinced that the deeper we place our self in anything we do, the greater our potential for joy.  In other words, the greater the self investment, the greater the joy (and disappointment) we open ourselves to experience.  Too many of us avoid the profound self investment in fear of experiencing failure.  In reality, that is letting fear guide our life decisions...which is no way to live.